Dealing With Negative People

When’s the last time you had to deal with a negative person? How did you handle it? Did you attack back, navigate through the situation with grace or walk away feeling bad about yourself?

Taking a moment to review a negative situation, while we’re calm, allows us to think about productive avenues for handling future negative people and situations. (Seriously reviewing any past situation allows us to think of better alternatives for the future.)

You may ask, why bother to have any forethought about our responses? The answer is simple; we damage ourselves by feeding into other people’s cycle of negativity!

Wherever we go, we are inevitably going to face people who are negative, people who oppose our ideas, people who piss us off or people who simply don’t like us. That’s the way life is, we are all, thankfully, different. Our differences are not the cause of conflict but they do trigger our emotions. Our emotions are what drive us back to our basic survival instinct of React and Attack. But, we have the ability to keep our emotions in check and control our responses.

Have you ever noticed that negativity spreads? I’ve found that if I’m around a negative minded person, their negativity starts to affect my thoughts and judgments. I’ve learned that when people initiate negativity, it is a direct reflection of their obvious self-dissatisfaction. People are often so bored and unhappy with their own lives that they want to bring others down too. Reacting to someone who is negative will only trigger anger and additional negative responses from that person. If we do respond, we have wasted our energy upon the unproductive. Energy wasted on negative people is energy that could have been spent on a million other, far more important issues.

Some people may have a less than articulate way of expressing themselves, it may even be offensive, but they are still entitled to do so. They have the right to express their own opinions and we have the right and willpower to choose our responses. There is a wonderful quote by Alex Noble, “If I have been of service, if I have glimpsed more of the nature and essence of ultimate good, if I am inspired to reach wider horizons of thought and action, if I am at peace with myself, it has been a successful day.” Noble sums up the true spirit of being at peace with one’s self. It’s a beautiful quote and perhaps one that we need to remember at the end of the day.

There is but one ride in this life … enjoy the journey!

©2010-2013 Journey To Self – All Rights Reserved

Stress and Finding A Balance

Everyone is affected by stress in one way or another. Managing stress, at times, can feel overwhelming. But, it is an issue of how we view and think about a trying situation, and then taking proactive actions.

You can peruse the Internet and find thousands of tips to combat stress, many of which are common sense actions such as, exercising, eating well and taking time for you … the list goes on. Have you ever thought about looking at the internal instead of the external?

Getting to know who you truly are is number one on my list of ways for combating stress. Be willing to take the time for introspection. I’m talking about real introspection, the type where you look at and acknowledge your faults, as well as your strengths. So what happens after you know all the pluses and minuses about you? You now have a healthy emotional arsenal to draw upon.

There is but one ride in this life … enjoy the journey!

©2010-2013 Journey To Self – All Rights Reserved 

Enjoying The Journey of Change

Ugh! Most of us don’t like change. After all it can be uncomfortable. But, if you've recognized that something in your life needs to change … you've already taken the first big step. And while it’s always important to be mindful of your feelings, it’s fairly easy to get caught up in the negative feelings versus embracing what will ultimately be a successful journey.

Thoughts to enjoy the journey:

1. Remember that you choose to make a change and trust in yourself.

2. When you begin to feel anxious or uncomfortable, embrace those feeling because they are part of the end result.

3. Take assessments often. If you take a step back and assess where you began in your journey, you can see how far that you’ve come toward change.

4. Give yourself a pat on the back. You took the steps to alter what wasn’t making you happy, don’t forget to reward yourself for your self-awareness and strength.

We can acknowledge that change isn’t easy, but it’s important to refocus your thoughts. With your new self-awareness, you can choose to shift your focus from negative and self-defeating thoughts to positive and fulfilling feelings.

There is but one ride in this life … enjoy the journey!

©2013 Journey To Self, All rights reserved. 

DLF Live to bring transcendental meditation to at-risk communities

The David Lynch Foundation announced June 4, the launch its new performance division, DLF Live. The launch will take place at the Bonnaroo Music and Arts Festival on June 15. DLF Live will connect the power of arts and creativity to bring transcendental meditation (TM) to at-risk communities.

The launch will be marked by a screening of, “Meditation, Creativity, Peace,” a documentary highlighting filmmaker David Lynch and his decades-long dedication to TM and the arts. The screening is sponsored by the David Lynch Foundation (DLF) and will be hosted by James McCartney, musician and son of legend Paul McCartney and Bob Roth, Executive Director of DLF.

DLF Live will produce concerts, film festivals, stand-up comedy shows, film competitions, conferences and art events to support the work of the David Lynch Foundation. All proceeds will go towards DLF's work to bring healing through TM to underserved communities. One of DLF Live’s goals will be to raise funds to teach TM to 1,000,000 at-risk youth around the world over the next five years.

Why introduce TM to at-risk youth? The benefits of meditation have been studied and found to be an effective tool by the Harvard School of Medicine, the National Institutes of Health, the U.S. Department of Defense, the American Heart Association and the American Medical Association. Meditation. These studies have been proven to reduce acute and chronic stress and stress-related disorders, decrease anxiety and depression, help individuals overcome addictions and simultaneously develop the brain and creative potential of the individual for a healthy, productive and self-sufficient life.

DLF Live’s Board of Advisors includes music industry leaders Russell Simmons, Scooter Braun, Dan McCarroll and Craig Kallman. DLF has previously produced benefit concerts and events featuring Paul McCartney, Ringo Starr, Wynton Marsalis, Martin Scorsese, Ellen DeGeneres, Russell Brand and Dr. Mehmet Oz. For more information about DLF, please visit their website and for more information about the Bonnaroo Music and Arts Festival screening, please visit Bonnaroo Cinema. 

Positive Affirmations During Your Journey Of Change

Change is usually not easy. Some people are highly adaptable to change, but most people like their “creature comforts” and become highly uncomfortable when life changes. But, part of true self-awareness is knowing that you need to change or that some aspect of your world needs to change.

Now that you’ve set out on your journey to a better world, you may begin to become uncomfortable and unsure. It’s the times when you are unsure that you need positive affirmations. Although positive affirmations may seem silly, these words are basically you parenting you. They are the words any loving parent would tell their child.

Review the following affirmations and be aware if one, or all, resonates with you:

• I am good.
• I am wanted.
• I am loved for the person that I am.
• My needs are not a burden.
• I am safe.
• I am a valuable person.
• I matter to those around me.

Perhaps the above affirmations didn’t faze you at all. My guess is that if you’ve gotten to this point of the article, one or more probably did. Remember throughout your journey to take time to comfort yourself. It’s okay to care about yourself!

©2013 Journey To Self, All rights reserved.

Choosing Happiness: The Achievable Possibility

Many people believe that they can only feel happiness when everything is going well in their lives. We tend to need a reason or situation to be happy. But, what if we changed our thought process about happiness and made a conscientious choice to be happy? Feeling joy and happiness can be achieved by making a choice to do so.

Put things into perspective. Most people do not live the ideal life and life brings us challenges on a daily basis. Have you stopped to think about how bad it really is? I’m talking about a true assessment of your life situation. Are you homeless, terminally ill, has your family disowned you? Get the picture? For the record I had a terminally ill sibling, who smile everyday for the time that they had left. That is not to say that everyone could or should be able to smile in the face of extremely difficult situations, nor is to judge the level of difficulty of another human being. However, it is to make a point about self-awareness and our personal choices.

Acknowledging that no one can gauge another person’s tolerance for life’s stress and that less extreme situations can legitimately feel as bad as any. Another thought is to remember that when things feel as if you’ve hit rock bottom, then there’s only up right? Better days will come and this is something to look forward to and smile about.

If you aren’t able to acknowledge that better days are one their way, are you able to be thankful for whatever is positive in your life? Stop and think about all the conveniences that you take for granted and be thankful for them. Conveniences such as a roof over your head, food, clean water, and a warm bed. These things are actually more then conveniences, they are luxuries to many. If you can feel grateful for what you have, let that gratitude turn into happiness.

“Nothing is impossible, the word itself says, I’m Possible!” ~Audrey Hepburn

©2013 Journey To Self, All rights reserved.

Five Tips For Managing Stress At Work

April is National Stress Awareness Month and with this in mind, now is probably a good time to think about one of our greatest stressors … work. Since studies show that Americans dedicate an average of 80% of our waking hours to work related activities, it would make sense that work related issues contribute to the majority of our stress.

Most of us can’t quit our jobs and quite frankly, quitting your job is not going to lesson your stress. Taking a step back and reframing both how you view your work life and how you manage your work life, can improve your quality of life. Check out these five quick and easy tips, try one or two and see the difference that they can make.

1. Plan your activities: It is important to timetable responsibilities, both on a daily basis and long-term. Plan out the, what, why, how, when, and who will do the job. By placing specific duties into a timeframe, you’ll be able to easily identify the weak link, address the issue and move forward.

2. Organize your time on a daily basis: Make a list of issues; give priority to the most important or the most pressing issues. At the end of each day check what you’ve completed. If you find that certain tasks or issues are not being addressed, re-evaluate your list.

3. Don’t hesitate to ask: In the fast paced world of today’s workplace, tasks and responsibilities often change. It is hardly a black mark against you to ask a question if you are unsure. However, not getting clarification and failing to deliver, will be.

4. Contribute to a positive environment at work: Be open for discussions, have good communication with others and do not be afraid of positive critique. Keep in mind individual differences, some people perform better under pressure, others need more time to organize their work. Knowing the work style of your colleagues is a positive when a project needs to be completed.

5. Take a break and delegate: Yes, you are allowed to take a breather. Break for a few minutes several time throughout the day and learn how to let go. For any Type A personality, delegating responsibilities can be tricky. But learning to delegate responsibility is necessary unless you prefer burnout.

Not a single one of the above tips are going to solve your work stress, but they will help you to begin to identify specific areas where you are able to begin to make changes. In my opinion, an area to really focus upon is a positive work environment. For those that are in supervisory positions, you set the tone of the work environment. Having a positive and energetic attitude is infectious and will help your employees to feel more positive … leading to more productivity and less stress for you.

©2013 Journey To Self, All rights reserved.